Siren Soup

Monday, September 26, 2005

I came very close to becoming a vegetarian last night....


When I go to a nice restaurant where there are things on the menu like Faus gras I really don't want what comes out on my plate to look like the above.

I, contrary to popular belief am not a bear. I do not like standing in a rushing river up to my waist, grabbing live fish out of the water, staring them down, then biting their head off.

Actually, when I eat fish at a restaurant I prefer it not to resemble the animal it came from in any way shape or form. That means that no matter how much the gay chef in the back thinks it looks pretty to serve me my trout with the fin sticking up in the back and all the skin on the bottom, it is very not cool. Because then I have to look very uncouth when the guy sitting across from me puts a piece of dinner bread over the fin so I don't have to look at it. Oy.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

My Karma is definitely about to run out....

Yes, so this is what I just had the pleaseure of viewing through my rearview mirror -- flashing lights and all. Fun huh?

So I pull over (after I hang up the cell phone) expecting the cop to come up and tell me I have a light out or some such similar nonsense and send me on my way.

Funny that I had no recollection of the fact that I had run a red light a little while back and I definitely didn't know there was a traffic camera there...

So I have my licensce out and he comes up and says I ran a red light, like he expected me to deny it or something. But I just said ok. And he asked for my licensce, registration, and insurance. I promptly give him my license and registration, however I have the sinking feeling that I forgot to put my new insurance card in the glovebox...so I take a pile of stuff out of the glovebox and of course there just happen to be some autograph cards from a washed up beauty queen....needless to say I got off with a warning... But after this and my flight miracle, I know my Karma will soon run out...

Monday, September 19, 2005

Pics from Charleston

Dinner at Meritage in Charleston
Really cool picture of the sand - at least I think so
This one's for you JPR....
Classic hold the camera and try to aim at yourself...
Where all the rich people live.....
Another self-taken picture....
The Beach (duh)

Ok, I am just way too lazy to put any thought into another post tonight but I figured I would post some pics from Charleston instead....

Some highlights of my trip "down south"

1. Whole grain waffle from the Waffle House (sounds like a contradiction I know...)

2. Experiencing, Shrimp and Grits, Fried Okra (yes I now know what okra is) and Collard greens

3. Going to a bar called Torch then looking up to find girls in fishnets, garters and bras go-go dancing on tables (a little scary...they need to lay off the cocaine....)

4. The "fragrant" smell of paper mills...

5. Shopping!

Ok, not an exciting post I know...I'm just too tired to be cute or funny right now...

You're kidding.....right?

Ok, I don't have time at the moment to write my memoirs of a trip to Charleston, however...I need to indulge in a quick rant on one of the most preposterous things I have ever heard.

So I am in the Charleston airport, after taking my sandals off and going through security barefoot after waiting in line for 45 minutes for my 6am flight...

So I get through security and go into your friendly, overpriced, airport newsstand. You see I have very fraile eardrums and like most people taking of and landing in a jet plane doesn't make them too happy.

So I wander over to where the fifteen billion types of candies and mints are which are completely surrounding a circular counter.

There is a man who is mysteriously circling this counter with the same confused look on his face. So we look at each other and say in unison..."where's the gum?" Figuring that there must be a hidden camera somewhere because we feel like we definitely must be missing something.

So a guy with a broom and an unruly beard says to us, "you can't sell gum in the airport". And we both look at him like he is crazy...."are you serious?" he says "Yeah, it's for maintenance purposes" Maintenance purposes?

OK, I have to admit I hate gum under the seat at the airport as much as the next person but come on, gum is a vital neccessity for anyone who is flying! I just didn't get it. He said I should try Mentos (not sure if e was trying to insinuate that I have bed breath). So I go to the counter to pay for my Mentos and still rather perturbed, say to the 60 year old cash register lady that I have never heard of an airport in my life that banned the selling of gum. She proceed to tell me that ..well.. Disney World doesn't allow gum anymore. Like this is supposed to make it ok. Last time I checked Disney World was not an AIRPORT. Where planes take off and people need gum for their ears. She went on to say that it is ALL the Disney Parks even the ones in JAPAN because this makes it more relevant to banning gum in an airport.

I give up. I ate my Mentos. And my ears still hurt. I'm done now.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Ok, this is going to be a really boring post so you might as well not read it. I am in South Carolina on VACATION! Woohoo. I am here visitng my formerly sinful bartender, pageant girl, smoking, drinking friend who used to bartend at:


  • You guessed it - the Pig's Eye Pub. But then she moved down south for a job and became a born again Christian...and got an accent. Both of which I totlly respect it's just a wee bit of an adjustment.

So anyway I got here this morning and had a liberating rental car day all to myself to wander around not knowing where I was going. I immiediately knoew I was in the south by the signs for Waffle House on every exit. I found an amazing outdoor shopping center and shopped, got a pedicure and had two glassed of wine with lunch...just because I can..cause I'm on vacation! Woohoo. Stay tuned for pics after the fact....

Monday, September 12, 2005

Did Somebody Say.... Wood?

Ok, so this is not the picture I really wanted to use. What I wanted was a picture of "Mr. Woodchuck" the handpuppet of Ranger Joe from Full House. But alas, the 80s sitcom icon is not to be found easily in the internet world.

Ah, to start my rant of the day. So at least once every couple of days and most recently by JPR today, I hear the expression "knock on wood". It's an odd expression but one that I have grown used to over my lifetime -- although I am not at all superstitious -- I have opened many umbrellas inside and walk under ladders all the time (maybe that's why I have such horrble luck...hmmmm....). ANYWAY... the point is, the majority of the time I hear this expression I am at work. And without a doubt every time someone says it they start looking frantically around whatever room we are in to find some wood to knock on, but alas, there is never any to be found. Instead they inevitably find themselves surrounded by unidentifiable man-made chemically indestructable substances (formica? Plastic?) and end up knocking their head instead (it makes you ponder the intelligence of people that think their skull is a good substitute for wood....). It is kind of disturbing when you picture some kind of nuclear attack where all life is wiped out but your grey cubicles remain....

Sunday, September 11, 2005

If I've Learned Anything...

...I've learned that you can get by on charm for about 15 minutes. After that, you'd better know something
...I've learned that you shouldn't compare youself to the best others can do, but to the best you can do.
...I've learned that it's not what happens to people that is important. It's what they do about it
...I've learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you a heartache for life
...I've learned that no matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides
...I've learned that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be
...I've learned that it's a lot easier to react than it is to think
...I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them
...I've learned you can keep going long after you think you can't
...I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel
...I've learned that I can't visit a bookstore without buying something
...I've learned that either you control your attitude, or it controls you
...I've learned that sometimes I just need to be held
...I've learned that no matter how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and their had better be something to take its place
...I've learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences
...I've learned that learning to forgive takes practice
...I've learned that when the light turns green, you had better look both ways before proceeding
...I've learned that you can love someone and still not like him very much
...I've learned that when I'm given a choice of 31 flavors of ice cream, I still choose vanilla
...I've learned that there are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it
...I've learned that money is a lousy way of keeping score
...I've learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time
...I've learned that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up
...I've learned that good quality underwear is worth the extra cost
...I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel
...I've learned that friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance
...I've learned that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all that they have
...I've learned that no matter how much I care, some peopl just don't care back
...I've learned that no matter how old I am, I want my mom when I'm hurting
...I've learned that maturity has more to do withwhat types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you have celebrated
...I've learned that you should never tell a child his dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if he believed it.
...I've learned that your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you aren't related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren't biological
...I've learned that no matter how good a friend someone is, they're going to hurt you once in a while, and you must forgive them for that
...I've learned that commercials for feminine hygeine products always come on when you are sitting in a room with men
...I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself
...I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world does not stop for your grief
...I've learned that boys only rub your back to find out if you are wearing a bra
...I've learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are but we are responsible for who we become
...I've learned that sometimes when my friends fight, I'm forced to choose sides even when I don't want to
...I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean that they don't love each other, and just because they don't argue, doesn't mean that they do
...I've learned that sometimes you have to put the individual ahead of their actions
...I've learned that it takes years to build up trust and only seconds to destroy it
...I've learned that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change
...I've learned that if you don't want to forget something, stick it in your underwear drawer
...I've learned that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
...I've learned that the clothes I like the best are the ones with the most holes in them
...I've learned that it's no fun putting on a wet swimsuit
...I've learned that it's not what you have in your life but whom you have in your life that counts
...I've learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different
...I've learned that peeing in the woods with a couple of friends can be an amazing bonding experience
...I've learned that a good friend is better than a therapist
...I've learned that sandwiches cut diagonally taste better
...I've learned that you're never too old for slumber parties
...I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved
...I've learned that competing with a friend over a man is fun unless one of you actually wins
...I've learned that it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting feelings and standing up for what you believe in.

Picture of the day


Aww come on, isn't that just one of the cutest puppies you ever have seen? I mean if I was walking by this dog, I would just be forced to announce it's presence by screaming "Puppy!" Ok, I never said I was normal or sane, but it is a really cute puppy. And this actually was a really great event - Nikki's Run that supports Pediatric Cancer Research and Miss Connecticut Teen USA, Jennifer Brooks (the girl with the crown lol) was nice enough to give some of her time to be a part f the event. As a nice little plug you should all (even though all is probably just me since no one knows this blog exists..) should go to Build-a-Bear and purchase the third version of Nikki's Bear - part of the proceeds benefit pedicatric cancer research go now.

While I am shamelessly advertising all of the causes I support - you all should also take a look at my Light the Night for Leukemia and Lymphoma Fundraising Page.

A good friend of mine had Leukemia and had his life saved by a bone marrow transplant. The Light the Night walk helps support research for all forms of blood cancer's and helps people like my friend get the bone marrow transplants that can svae their lives. Every little bit helps!

Okay, I am going to get off my soapbox now. I think all of the various cleaning chemicals I used today to bring my apt back to it's shiny glory have made me a bit loopy... so I'm gonna stop now.

Friday, September 09, 2005

The 6'4' Leprechaun...

Limericks courtesy of JPR - My fuel fume inhaling Leprechaun....

There once was a guy who was bored
> > But he knew that he could not afford
> > To write an email
> > Lest the jet engine fail
> > And inspire swift kicks to his gord.
> >
> > Whats that, you want another one? Too bad, Im bored
> > and Im writing it anyways.
> >
> > There once was a plate of falafel
> > And I though it tasted just awful
> > So I threw it away
> > And then heard myself say,
> > "I think I want a big waffle"

Thursday, September 08, 2005

My first blog

Well I have now officially stepped over to the dark side (funny how that just spawned images of Darth Vader and reminded me how much I wanted my hair to look like Princess Leah's when I was little - because you all know everyone wants two cinnamon buns growing out of the side of their head...)

I must first thank JPR for introducing me to this horrible addictive world - hopefully it won't become as bad an addiction for me as Alias... but that is a whole nother post altogether...

Now if I were you I would seriously think that I was lying about my profession in my profile, because I labeled it as "technology"-- HOWEVER one would think if I had a career in Technology it would not have taken me over an hour to figure out how the heck to post a pic in my profile, so now I am thoroughly exhausted and want nothing more than to return to my Sex and the City DVD marathon...which I am about to do.

SATC thought for the day "How do you know when a guy's "light" is on?"